I feel strange. I have fear inside....I thought I am strong, but right now I really feel weak, like I am loosing faith... I need to hold on to my faith, that everything is going to be just fine. That after the surgery, I will still be able to open my eyes. Be able to stand up again. To fight for another life.
I thought I will never be afraid. I thought I am strong. But right now, I can feel the weakness of a normal human being. I am not afraid to die, but I am afraid of the pain and physical struggle that I have to face again. I am afraid of the outcome or the complications after. All I can do is pray and hold to my faith. Prayers from everyone.. My doctor called, and the major surgery will be on April 11.
I hope that when I wake up tomorrow, my fears are all gone!!!