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Sunday, August 31, 2014

Show Me The Way

I don't know if this is a miracle, but I just feel healed before and after the household meeting. I just hope that God hear all my pains. I pray that he will show the way according to his will because right now, I am totally lost. It's like a never ending going back and forth which makes me feel that it needs to end. And if it is really the message, then I pray to show me how. And if it is not, then show me the way.

Friday, August 29, 2014

Dark Room

Still in the dark trying to find my way out from this misery. Is it just me?? Is it just me who is locking myself in this dark room?

I am trying my best to understand and accept, but time comes where I just cant help it but feel the pain.

I feel so alone.,, Noone is beside me whom I can lean on. Someone that I know I can depend on when I am getting lost and need some guidance


Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Whisper Of Gossip

I can see someone whispering here and there. It's an obvious whisper of a gossip about someone hahhahhahha!!! I am so glad I don't have to hear any of those petty whispering about someone. I am so tired of these environment already. My life is so quiet now and so happy about it.

My mind is so focus on my life's issues and all the important things I need to focus on with my life.

I know that daily living can never be perfect, but as long as I distance myself with these nonsense talk, I am good!!!

I don't care about anyone's life and whatever they do with themselves!!

Monday, August 25, 2014

Mocking Me

I just find it so interesting when I know within me that I really don't care about anybody on that place, yet an insecure woman can still see me... The funniest thing is when I heard her mock me,, hahhahah!!! I know it's me but I know what it means!!!! Hate!! Hate for nothing!!! Smiling at me and hating me behind my back, hahhaha!!! What a shame!!

I don't think I can give a nice smile to someone I hate, but she does!!! Isn't that a suffering??? And why does she Hate me?? It's probably because she can see something in me that she don't have, or she probably have, but hate to see in me.. waaahahahahah... My back is STRAIGHT!!! My spinal cord is STRAIGHT!!! hahahha!!!

I just go there to do my thing, and go home..

Saturday, August 23, 2014

Happiness Is Us

It's annoying to hear someone talk indirectly about praying to be happy each day.He said it as if he was trying to rely his happiness on me??? What does he think of me??? A clown???..

Happiness starts with us. It's only us who can make ourselves happy and nobody else. And it's not everyday that you expect that life can be pleasing. Life sometimes makes us lonely and sad.
So he shouldn't expect me to be happy all the time knowing that I am going through some rough time in my life.

I hate it when someone is depending on me. Specially this kind of stupid way of thinking. Because I have nothing to do with anyone's happiness.

Standard Of My Life

Is it over? This is the never ending question in my head because I feel it will never end because of the so called NATURE that don't know, or I should say stupid enough to know my standard of RESPECT of feeling, all these time.

Yes, it is simple my standard that is probably bothering me inside. It is simply because I know exactly what I want and what I don't want in my life. I always try my best to understand everything and everyone around me without setting aside or forgetting what I want.

There is always an end to everything because everyone has a breaking point that love alone is not the answer.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Feeling Of Betrayal

That feeling that you thought you have a best friend for the rest of your life then suddenly it turn out that, this person is the one who will betray you and break your heart so deeply.

Everything makes you feel lost in a very dark room where you don't know where and how to get out.

Still hanging on with so much hope, wish and prayers that this struggle will soon end.

Sunday, August 17, 2014

Life's Test

Life can never be perfect. I have been so happy and I was at the peck of my happiness until a test of life comes in, to challenge my faith. I have expected this to come because I know I am at the pick of my happiness and I thought that happiness will never end until this test of life comes in.

Oh yeeah, life can never be perfect. I know that my haters are so happy and so eager to know what ruins my happiness and I am not stupid to go on a detail of my life's issue. But right now, I am still alive and having so much hope that all this problems will be gone and more happiness will come,